milch und gouda.

It's only been one week since I left Canada but I'm already starting to have feelings for Germany. I know. It's fast, but I'm falling for this country.
But of course, no relationship is perfect.

There are way too many smokers in Germany. Just yesterday i went to a german soccer game in bochum (frankfurt vs. bochum) and it was insane. These soccer fans (mostly male) are huge, drink beer all day long, smoke endlessly and love to urinate along the side of the roads into the bushes. These men have no shame. It was definitely an enjoyable experience that i don't need to repeat for a long time.

But you know, all of this was balanced out by the amazing landscape. Germany is a small country (most are in Europe) but I feel like they conserve a lot. They take care of their water, electricity and really try to conserve energy. I was in the bus when we travelled to Bochum while listening to music and all I could think was, how can there not be a God? The colours, structure, their functions in nature. I can say the same thing from studying physiology: the study of the functions and integrations of the systems maintaining an equilibrium environment in the human body. There are precise signals in our body, i.e. a hormone that maintains the strenghth of your bones for example. I just do not believe that all of this, from the yellow pigment in the canola fields to the hormone erythropoietin necessary to make new red blood cells were made by chance. If anything, I am starting to see more and more that man destroy this beauty. I was also thinking how easy faith can be. To merely believe, without political religious views, controversy, hatred...

I remember maybe five or six years ago, I would pass by Algonquin or the East Coast but the nature never really got to me. I would only complain about the long ride. But yesterday I realized that I can't live without the nature this Earth has to offer. I know this may sound strange but I think that I am fully appreciating these gifts because of the hardships, challenges and hurt that I've experienced. We don't realize this at the time but often we can't help being selfish when we are hurt or fall. We are only able to think about the pain, how it happened in the first place and how to rid ourselves of our miseries.

This year was very rough for me. There were weeks when I just couldn't do anything, literally. But I don't think I was destroyed to the point where I couldn't remember the beautiful sights and memories in my life. And now, I am seeing such things that I've been anticipating through my rainy days and more. It's an amazing feeling that I hope everybody will be able to experience at some point in their lives. This is not the end for me yet either.

And lastly on that note, I've also realized that everybody has their own particular, unique pace. As many of you may now, I am quite the impatient worker. I need things done at my pace, on my watch, and it is stressful!1` I need to learn to accept that I think, both for myself and others.

I hope you are all doing well. I apologize for a much less eventful entry but I am sitting here in my host family's house, in my pjs at 1pm in Germany wanting to simply do nothing today.
I want to absorb all of this.

Until next time,

tschüss!

erin.